Talking to your children about important issues…

Children are our future, we live for them and they bring us so much joy. But in every child’s life, it comes a moment where you have to explain to him the big themes, there comes a moment where you have to talk about subjects that you would rather not approach. And this is the biggest mistake we make when it comes to this type of situations. We try to avoid talking to our children about important subjects because we are afraid that we will scar them. But understand this, avoiding serious discussions doesn’t mean that you can keep your children away from those specific and deep issues.

There is not Santa, gay people, abortion, sex, rape, religion, these are subjects that your child will be exposed too as soon as they end up in a group. So you should not cling onto the hope that your child will be sheltered, because that will not be the case. As soon as a child starts school, you can bet on the fact that he will find out things that you would prefer stay hidden. So the only chance to control your child’s reactions to issues like this is to make sure that you get ahead of the curve and tell him before he finds out on his own.

Yes, discussing those sort of things can be hard, very hard even and you may feel the need to protect your child for longer, to let him enjoy his youth and innocence. But think about this, are you absolutely sure that he will not find out things from other sources? Trust me, it is far worse for a child to find out that Santa Claus is not real at school from his friends than it is for you to sit him down and calmly explain to him the same thing. And this is valid for any other single subject. Do not be afraid to talk about anything, because every single subject on this planet is better suited for a parent’s ear than anybody else…

Of course, out of all the subjects out there, none is more taboo between parents and children than sex. That is a huge mistake and it leads to so many problems you can’t even imagine. Don’t be afraid to talk to your child about sex and understand that you should not be ashamed about this subject. We are all having sex, we all have fantasies and it is normal to have those. Explain to your child what sex means and teach your child how to react to things. Teach him or her about sexual abuse, tell them what to do when they are in danger, make them feel free to express their desires, whatever what those might be.

The good way to talk about these issues is to be completely honest. Don’t lie, don’t try to shield or protect your child from reality, living in a fantasy land will not help him. Tell him the true hard facts as early as possible, it is the best way to prepare him for life, it is the best way to make sure that you are raising a powerful individual that will have all the necessary tools to survive and not a whiny snowflake that keeps on complaining that life isn’t fair to him. Teach your child early on that life isn’t fair and you will be far better in the long run.

In conclusion, talking to your child about important issues should be a joy, not a chore. Start considering your child as a friend and be ready to relate to him as you would to any other people your age. Don’t consider him to be incapable of understanding what you are explaining, give him or her more credit. Our children are our future yes, but that will only happen if we stop keeping them in a bubble of our own making. Believe fully in your children and act accordingly… Who knows, they might actually surprise you…

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